Save yourselves...

In my service to Mistress Mother Nature I spend time daily weeding, watering, fertilizing and otherwise caring for and worshiping her beauty. So far, I haven't killed anything although the blue columbine I planted is still flowerless while HER pink columbines are setting records for blooms.  Go figure.

New Pinkness

Each year I plant boatloads of impatiens. They may be my favorite annual because they come in virtually every color, they grow in shade, they tell you immediately when they need water (they wilt visibly - sometimes I swear I can hear them gasping) and if you fertilize the hell out of them, they will quickly fill whatever space you put them in, completely eliminating the need to do much weeding.

Yesterday, at the back of a bed of impatiens I discovered this:

Oh. Em. Gee.

I showed it to Sparky but he dismissed it. "It's just a hole. Relax."

Relax? How can I relax? I watch NatGeo TV!

Now it all makes sense. The bunny that lived in our yard disappeared. And the squirrel population is dwindling rapidly. The signs are obvious.

There are Subterranean Pythons in Connecticut. 

God help us all.

Nuts

At this time of year, when the weather turns colder, we occasionally get critters making their way into the house. Usually a field mouse or two - which Sparky will humanely trap and toss back outside. Then they try to make their way back in. It's his version of the Circle of Life.

Me, I have a different theory. They're animals and they belong outside - catch them, kill them and staple their hides to the door as an example to other mice considering our home as a winter vacation. (I'm the bloodthirsty one in this family)

So it wasn't a huge issue when I heard the skittering of tiny feet and saw a flash of brown fur. I texted Sparky that we needed to get the traps and went on with my life. (I know what you're thinking but geez - It's not like I could catch it bare-handed, these little fuckers are FAST!)

The next day, I saw it again only this time I actually SAW it - it's not a fieldmouse.

He looks just like this...

We have the world's biggest hickory tree in our front yard, so we're always seeing squirrels in the yard. For a few years, we had a particularly sneaky red-tailed squirrel who would hurl hickory nuts at us. He had great aim, too - you'd have to duck and run from the driveway to the front door. But we've never had one in the house. Suprising, really considering Son O'Mine has a habit of leaving the doors wide open when he is outside.

We can't use the mouse traps because squirrels have bigger heads (even though this is a little squirrel) so we need to find a better way to get rid of him. I did a little research. They said to close him off into one room (did that) and open a window or door to outside (yep) and put a cracker with some peanut butter on the sill outside (check).

Now, I didn't sit there and watch - left the door open for a couple hours, but the cracker is still there. Maybe he doesn't like JIF creamy peanut butter? Should I have used the Skippy Extra Chunky?

Or maybe he did go outside - haven't heard him since. Although I half expect to see him one of these days pumped up and pissed off...

Hey, it could happen...